Tuesday 12 June 2012

Real Men Hunt in Packs


I have been somewhat neglecting my poisonous pondering duties, of this I am acutely aware.  There is however, excellent reason for this... mostly I have been pondering the possibility of a specialist interest blog - in a vain attempt to move away from just being spectacularly self indulgent and hoping to write about something that people who do not actually know me might be interested in reading...

This has caused great inner turmoil for the Pixie. 

It turns out that any passing semblance to a specialist interest that I have is most definitely covered by far more qualified, talented and taller people than I.  My knowledge is simply not expansive enough to write about poetry or music.  I don't watch enough movies anymore to qualify for a film blog.  I considered comics and general geekery, but realised that this is an area the blogsphere is rather inundated with already.  I'm dangerously underqualified to write about mental health or therapy with any real weight behind my glib commentary.  I'm not funny enough to write a comedy blog.  I don't regularly practice any kind of witchery or general hippiness that much anymore, so am a wee bit out of the loop on that one.  I am, it transpires, quite distinctly average... how terribly dreary of me.

So, unfortunately, this means that you will have to continue to be subjected to my self indulgent ramblings every once in a while, combining a number of my distinctly average specialist interests with the dull sound of me whining and intermittently screaming... poor you.

Now then, where was I.....

Ah yes. 

Euro 2012....

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Up until fairly recently I had managed to live my entire adult life free of men who like football - ah those were the halcyon days... (they weren't really I'm just saying that for dramatic effect

However, it seems I now find myself living with two of them.

During Euro 2012.  (probably - I think that's what it's called)

I can't escape it.  It's everywhere.  It's on all the time.  There is advertising for it everywhere.  Even when it's not actually happening live or on the TV, it is still being talked about.  Drooling, over-entitled knuckledraggers are being fawned over and vilified in equal measure - as if they some how matter. GAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH... it just makes me so cross!

AND THERE IS NO ESCAPE!!!!!!!

In other, less nightmarish news:-

We spent the Jubilee weekend with the lovely Mr Ben's parents - which was lovely.  We watched a lot of telly all about how brilliant the Queen is, interspersed with news reports about the telly we'd just watched about how brilliant the Queen is, interspersed with eating and drinking lots and talking about how brilliant the Queen is because we got to be doing all of that on a Monday and a Tuesday, when we should really have been at work - but the Queen is brilliant so we had 2 days off instead... yey Queen!

I also read a squawking article by Jan Moir (by accident - Ben's Mum is a secret Daily Mail reader) - about how women who cry at work are weak and should have their testicles removed or something... I glazed over after the red mist descended and I had to go and have a cup of tea and a calm down and talk a bit more about how brilliant the Queen is.

The ever smashing Miss Laura has asked me to be a bridesmaid in her upcoming nuptials, when she will become Mrs Matt (I've never even been near a concentration camp) Smith... ain't that just grand?!?!?  Once we can get around finding matching dresses that will suit a slender size 8 and a boobilicious size 12, I believe my main task for the event will be to stop the Bride from freaking the fuck out and hosing the attending guests down in a hail of bullets... or at least plying her with the appropriate amount of booze to calm her, but not so much that pole dancing around the elderly relatives seems like a good idea... phew, I feel I may have my work cut out!!!

I also seem to find myself embroiled in charity work again... or rather - the creation of a charity.  I'm not really sure how it happened - I wasn't even drunk.  Initially the whole thing seemed like a jolly good plan and I was terribly flattered to have been asked to be involved in the inception of what seems like a brilliant charity aimed at raising the confidence levels of younguns.... and let's face it, who couldn't have done with a bit more confidence at school?!?!?
So brilliant idea - totally behind it - working with people I know, admire, respect and adore - love it - really good opportunity etc. I've been designing art work for marketing campaigns, coming up with logos and playing around with branding, found an accountant who is willing to be a Trustee and do our accounts - all in the space of about 2 weeks.... when I first told Ben about it, he said 'that sounds terrifying'... and I was all like 'nah.. it'll be fine... we'll be aces'....

Yup... had our first meeting as a group on Sunday ... totally terrified now. 

There is a highly strong possibility that I am way in over my head.... At some point I will be discovered as a fraud and a charlatan once again and booted out of this Utopian society of creative minds and do-gooders... until then however, I shall work my little pixie socks off to make it work.

I'm also passing the inbetween worrying about other stuff times by worrying about the future...stoopid future... stoopid being happy and wanting more of the happy stuff and actually being in a position to achieve it at some point... Gaaah!
My mind may explode.... or I may fall victim to Eduardo Monteaz this very weekend in some kind of Agatha Christie-esque plot.

Either way, at least I won't have to watch any more football!


Quivery Pixie Out
x



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