Have Love, Will Travel

Greetings my lovelies - my my hasn't it been an age?

Well this is because while I have plenty to write about and probably a whole bunch I should be writing about for the sake of my inner calm, I'm not entirely sure that voicing most of it in a public forum is entirely appropriate - a wise man said to me recently about the art of blogging that it is one thing to write knowing that anyone could read your ramblings, it is entirely another to write knowing that someone could be reading them...

I have spent many months now attempting to perform damage control and behave in a way that would prevent other people from getting hurt or being upset...nevertheless, despite my best efforts and driving myself a little mad with anxiety, people have been hurt and upset and generally my nearest and dearest have been having a tough time and I can't help but feel largely responsible for most of it - I suppose you can't change every aspect of your life in the space of 6 months and not expect it to have some impact on those around you.

So I have decided that I will just have to try and relax a bit and take the blows as they come - I've driven myself to distraction trying to avoid causing and receiving any more pain and I have failed - so perhaps I should just enjoy the good times, stop feeling guilty about everything all the time and stop worrying that it's all going to go horribly wrong at any moment. There is nothing I can do about any of it.

With this in mind - I will now be updating with wild abandon about the lovely things in my life... and when it all goes horribly wrong, I will just have to deal with it.

And finally...

If you've never experienced these guys... go do it now...



The Big Come Up is their debut album - they're on their 6th now... but because I'm a wanker, I like their early, more raw stuff better - think Hendrix meets south of the river grumbly blues and you're about there - I am slowly converting a legion of new fans for them

The lovely Mr Ben took me to see them at the Colston Hall this week, because he is lovely. The Colston Hall is a horrible place to see a gig. The band more than made up for it. They kick out one hell of a noise for a 2 piece.

Also, mongoose lemurs are awesome - FACT.



(We went to the zoo this week and saw these guys up close and personal - I haven't just taken a shine to pretend monkeys at random)



Pixie Out

That's Where My Groove Is...

Busy busy busy...

Sad times.
Angry times.
Heartbroken timeS.
Slowly putting myself back together times.
Happy times.
Drunken times.
Lovely times.
Sleepy times.

Gigs.
Burlesque.
Roleplaying.
Divorced before I'm 30.
Too much of a social conscience for recruitment.
Not enough hours in the day.
Smashing friends.
Lovely man.
Lots of beer.
Plotting of super villany.


And thus is the long overdue summary of the Pixie's life.

Too busy to be eloquent today... at some point I will formulate a loquacious novel to fill in all the gaps - but for now... Need. To. Work.... GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!

Won't you be my sunshine, baby?

Amidst much petulance, sad face making and general gnashing of teeth many weeks seem to have passed since I last updated... I never promised to update regularly and my talent for disorganisation is only bested by my talent for procrastinating... so really, you're lucky to be getting anything at all from the mottled tomes of the Pixie.

Still... some very sad times have occurred and I was left crawling away from the battle field licking my wounds... time to heal is being had and friends are being beautiful and supportive...nevertheless, I remain uncomfortable, uncertain and generally lacking a safety net. I am a fragile little Pixie... not feeling particularly warrior like at the moment... I'm sure I will get it back eventually... but for now, hiding away in a drunken stupor is working out quite nicely (except that whole ' going to work with a stinking hangover' thing... yeah won't be doing that again.)

With all this sadness going on, I have still found time for some brightness.

My boss thinks I am so many kinds of awesome still... I think he may be slightly mad.... he is talking about me becoming a big corporate shark with him... I think we're gonna need a bigger boat!.... and I am going to need new shoes for the job :)




I have been intro gamed - which was awesome... my big gay space elves are perhaps not as big and gay as I was lead to believe ... I am also learning to paint with my weekly painting lessons as lead by Captain Barbeque and the lovely Mr. Ben... and as it transpires I am - and I quote, 'better than a 12 year old boy' - and my models 'don't look as bad as I thought' - thank you my Aryan Prince.

Jefferson 'Master Cylinder, Cock as Black as the Night (but apparently not) A Bomb McDeath - Urban Destruction' came to visit the Nerd Tower - much drinking, talking of inner city London institutionalised educational racism and general other buggery was discussed including the addition of 'death by Jeff's Cock' to our sweep stake of how Team Track Slag are going to destroy their newly acquired purchase. This latest addition to the sweepstake by the lovely Ms. Cat, frankly seems more likely than any of the other bets.

The visitation of the A Bomb did mean that our neighbours were disturbed and came to complain about the noise the following day - something I had been losing sleep over till now... but of course now it's happened and they already hate us, there is little more for me to worry about - curse my cripplingly low self esteem...curse it to Hades!

Last night we all went to see Alice in Wonderland... and frankly I don't give 2 tiddly poops what anyone else thinks... I loved it... it was the heart of Lewis Carrol teamed with the soul of Tim Burton - yes it was a little silly in places but it was a psychedelic romp through beautiful drug induced dream like scenery with equally perfectly imagined characters and a story that while new, grasped perfectly at the roots of the original books - which by the way are probably my favourite childhood books. What the Chronicles of Narnia did to smoosh my childhood love and make it horribly clear that a story I had loved as a child was just poor - this just made me squeal like a little girl...

Also there was a trailer for this:




There are people riding dragons and Vikings.... I had a moviegasm... a little bit.... mmmmm dragons :)

Also I just managed to score Monday off work... so I get to go see The Boy perform for the first time on Sunday night and finally pop my Burlesque Cherry.... woop hoot and yey!!!

Good times on the horizon...

Battered, bruised, wound licking but sunning herself in the brightness Pixie out
xxx

We Live in a Beautiful World

Phew! Much has occurred in the last couple of weeks and this Pixie is most satisfied with it all.

I have proven beyond any doubt amidst much bemoaning, wailing and gnashing of teeth that 4th Ed. Bards are both awesome and indeed win... unfortunately most of my group now want to play Bards, which would rather defeat the object of the exercise but ho hum - it's an improvement from 'you're never playing a Bard in my game, not ever... Bards are pony'... ha! showed you!

The Luncheon Club Dedicated to the Destruction of Stuff defeated No Face in a hail of glory and hot on the heels of this epic victory Skeletor and his Minions went down like little pussy bitches in just a single week thanks to a joint team effort but largely to the strange and oddly imperialistic knowledge of the world that our Furher seems to possess... perhaps it is all that invasion planning that has afforded him such a wealth of knowledge... of course now we have to come up with another team name but those free drinks tasted all the sweeter as they were lined with pure, 100% beautiful victory.

My training course seems to have come to an abrubt halt with the finance company sending out a letter stating that the training provider has ceased to trade - apparently I should keep paying them my money as they are attempting to source an alternative provider... frankly I don't want to - it's a lot of money and I was really only doing it so I could get an awesome job as a web designer... now that I have an awesome and enormously time consuming job, it seems a little silly to continue when all I would be doing is paying a lot of money to look at something I find interesting but am never going to use - much like all the other training courses / degree that has left me in a whole heap of debt that I have never really recovered from. Also, by the time I come home from work all stressed out (in a good way) the last thing I want to do is sit in front of more work for hours. My social life is just as busy as my working life right now and I simply don't have time for it!!!! (oh woe is me, the life of a social butterly... boo fucking hoo!!!!)

I also had some of my lovely photo shoot pictures come back - I be nekked! They are beautiful and very arty though, quite the testament to the photographer, I think. It was a very positive experience, I felt very empowered afterwards, even if a little cold - lying on a cold concrete floor wearing precisely nothing is not particularly warming, you know! My muscles ached like buggery afterwards as well from all the unnatural poses I was holding - I ached for about 2 weeks in places I didn't even know I had places! Totally worth it though :)

Last night the Nerd Tower played host to the beginning of the lovely Nicola's Vampire campaign, which looks like it is going to be really very good - despite all the buffoonery and general silliness that occurs in any roleplaying game in which you let this particular group of nerds participate... good times :)

Anyway my lovelies, that is all from me - I must be away, there are some woodland creatures that need my assistance - I really shouldn't answer the Pixie Phone this early in the morning.

Satisfied Pixie Out

xxx

I'm in the band, though not necessarily on the wagon

Well it seems only right that I should jump on the slightly drunken bandwagon of justice and commit to record my ten garage cars of choice... though I must admit, these fall very much under the 'mode of transport' division rather than being actual cars.

That said, I do have a couple of actual factual cars in my 10 car garage of awesome and win... the first of which being this...



Jaguar E Type - of course I would just keep the lovely lovely body work in British Racing Green (obviously) and replace the inner workings with something that starts when I want it to and stops when I want it to... and, you know, goes hella fast and that... speaking of which...



Suzuki Bandit 1500 R .... can I get a varoooooooooom?!?!!? I have always wanted this bike... I covet this shiney little death trap... oh how I covet it so...mmmmm delicious!



Triumph Spitfire MkII - in much the same vein as the Jag, I want the shell kept and the innards replaced with modern technology that works and goes fast... however, unlike the Jag... the Spitfire MUST be in bright gaudy yellow...



Alec Issigonis once designed the most horrific car in the world... ever... but he also made these little puppies and I love them ... little car for a little girl... hella nippy though :)I even like the new style Mini...



Harley Davidson Nighthawk.... mat black sex on wheels... varooooooommmmm nomnomnom!



K.I.T.T.... I. want. this. car. ... I want this car as voiced by Val Kilmer... man has a sexy voice ... and car has many gadgets that make pixie happy :)



Yeee hah! ... It's the General Lee... God Bless the Confederacaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!



This was the Pontiac Trans AM from Smokey and the Bandit... but then Captain Barbeque and Mr Ben reminded me of the wonder that is the Mystery Machine... and here it is in all it's ridiculous glory

So you thought my choices so far were silly?.... get a load of these next two:



This bad boy is just too cool to allow a whole picture of him... he would just break your minds with his awesomeness.... ah to ride around on the back of a dragon... of course I would require some kind of chain mail bikini, furs and large swords.... grrrrr... warrior pixie!!!!

And Finally...



Meet Hercules, the liger.... I shall put armour and a saddle on him and ride him around like Battlecat... now that would be a sight to behold! I actually also like the idea of having a London bus in my garage... but that takes me up to 11... and only Spinal Tap are cool enough to pull that off!




You can all shut up!!!

You give a little love....

I have had the most wonderful birthday weekend and I would just like to thank everyone who made it so special.

I am blessed to have such beautiful people in my life.

I love you guys.... that is all.



Happy Pixe Out

...and don't it feel good...

Firstly, a big thank you to the fabulous Ms Cat and Mr Ben for allowing me to surf their sofa this week, feeding me, driving me around, helping me work out where things are in this city paved with kebabs and generally looking after me while I navigate my first week at work.

So far my working week has run as follows:

- Day 1. Start at 10 - spend the day sorting out the office, climbing over and under tables moving computers, setting up phones, faxes and printers, fiddling about in the server - made the school boy error of knowing things about IT and have probably therefore secured my future as office IT guru, especially since the actual IT department is based in London - I see my job remit changing quite quickly - poop. Allowed to leave early due to sheer chilliness of the office - meet Ms Cat from work where she brings me a cup of steamy hot coffee and takes me shopping to acquire things for my new flat using the guilt money my Dad gave me for Christmas - terribly successful trip - woop!

- Day2. Start going through worker files - still not quite figured out what my job actually entails but getting there slowly - Boss buys us lunch and sympathises with me about my marital situation - it's like she actually cares about her workers - amazing. Spend the evening with the Frenchy picking up some of my stuff from Bath and taking it to the new flat - very painful few minutes spent with the curly one. Then pub to discuss some house rules with Captain Barbeque and the Frenchy - the overriding rule seems to be 'don't be a dick' with a few small amendments to include such things as 'never take anything Dom says literally' and 'we must steal a beer mat from every pub we visit'... these are all rules we can live by I think

- Day 3. Boss calls at 7.30am to say that she is closing the office today and we should work from home and gives me a bunch of research to do - begin the research at about 10 after a nice long shower and a bucket of coffee - have to call boss at about 11.30 to tell her that the net has been disconnected in the flat and as such I can't do any work - she is very cool about the whole thing... I know it's early days but I think she may be the best boss in the world. Spend the rest of the day watching Frisky Dingo - which may well be the best cartoon since the Venture Brothers - and distracting Mr Ben from doing any work... Ms Cat comes home, eats the yummy food Ben made and falls asleep like a cute little kitten on the couch... Ben and I decide that there simply isn't enough booze in the house and as such a further trip to the pub is warranted - we bond over a couple of jars, how pathetic and cynical we are and how much we miss the 90s

- Day 4. Office still closed - researching government legislation and waiting for a phone call from my boss - concentration levels reached saturation point for both Ben and I and we spent a good 25 minutes watching an old woman attempt to de-ice her car and drive away ... so invested were we in this woman's exploits that when she eventually made it out of the space we cheered! Nevertheless we have both been working very hard - although I do seem to find myself blogging during work hours - these habits are so hard to get out of...Hoping to get the rest of my stuff this evening but very reliant on the weather and the Germanic efficiency of everyone's favourite national socialist...

- Day 5. Has yet to occur and even I cannot predict the future of my own life but the office is re-opening and I am hoping to move in to the flat and start making it look like a girl lives there too before it is turned in to a GW warehouse... I have enlisted the help of the Ginge for heavy lifting, excessive moaning and tea making - hopefully by the time the boys move in next weekend, the place will look lovely - or at least my room will :)

Looks like the pieces of my slightly broken life are starting to fall in to place with a little help from my truly wonderful friends - I love you guys.

This is for you my temporary roomies ...



Gratefulpixie out